Saturday, September 26, 2009

pass it forward...

I've always been an optimist.

I've been told that I must have been born with rose colored glasses.
It's just the way I am.

Sure, there are times when life doesn't necessarily go quite my way, or at least the way I thought they should go. But I find I have the innate ability to look at whatever obstacle in my path from a uniquely different perspective. It entirely changes the view. And sometimes, just sometimes that view is actually better than the one I would have initially chosen for myself.

So when things happen to me, good or bad, I take it in stride.

I don't wig out too much. At least I try not to. Because I know that at any moment the tide may change. As will the panorama in front of me. So I wait.

If it's good, well, that's pretty easy. I continue on my way expressing gratitude and spreading good cheer. If it's something bad, that's different. The way that I deal is by withdrawing. I lick my wounds, tweak my perception and then reemerge a 'whole' being once more. There have been some events in my life that have set me back and made me ask the big questions. The 'where am I and what am I doing here' big question. The 'why me' big question. Or the biggie, 'what the f*ck' question.

I think most of us have faced that same dilemma at one time or another.

Thankfully, I can count the really horrendous happenings on one hand. I consider myself quite fortunate.

But there have also been times when I felt that my darling rose colored glasses had impeded my view. That they failed me by not allowing me clear vision. That my view was so altered and skewed that I failed to see the real truth. Thus preventing my brain the information needed to make the correct decision.

There have been instances when my rose colored glasses have been so trodden on and cracked that I thought they couldn't be placed on my face again. That perhaps I might not view my world as a rosy, warm fuzzy bubble again. I was Humpty Dumpty.

But then my optimism kicks in.
And I look around.

Miraculously, I am able to wipe those trampled bad boys off and find they fit as good as new.

I've been told by a spiritualist in the past that my soul is in its 'dharma'. The last phase of karma. They asked me, "Do good things happen to you?"
"Why yes, all the time."

I had a woman approach me in a store and told me I had a beautiful aura. That it was, "orange. With a hint of yellow." I had no idea what she was talking about, but I thanked her...and proceeded to walk away. Quickly. It wasn't until I got home and did an Internet search about auras and their meanings that she was giving me quite a compliment. Who knew?

I don't know how or why these things happen to me, but I'm not going to question it. I'm actually afraid to question it. I'm frightened that if I do, it may change. Drastically. When I start to stress, somehow relief is just within sight. It's crazy. But it's true.

Like I said, I'm quite fortunate.

Oh, my patience gets repeatedly tried. But in the big picture of things, it's not a huge deal. For instance, the lines that I found myself in time and time again the other day. In retrospect it was wonderfully hysterical. There was a purpose for the lines beyond my comprehension. I believe I was stuck there so I could witness and make mental notes of the bizarre dance we do in cues. Had I not had the experience, I wouldn't have the fodder to make my last blog post. Do you realize that posting had the most comments of any I've written thus far? Do you know why?

Because we've all been there...

We have all had the frustration of experiencing idiocy no matter where we live. It happens everywhere. It's like we share a collective memory.

It's possible I might have flipped out in that situation, because it hindered my immediate future. It was out of my control. It wasn't what I had planned. And yet, if you step away for a moment, it was just a few minutes of my time. And it was pretty damn funny. Surreal almost. So it's all in how you choose to look at it. It's all in our perception.

One of the comments read, "Wow. You must have bad karma."

In that moment, I did. But having the ability to twist it into your favor, that, I would say, is good karma.

I have a 'pass it forward' mentality. A 'do unto others as you'd have them do unto you' way about me. It's about plugging into the positive energy of the universe. About faith and believing in the good that surrounds us.

Have you ever noticed that if you feel confident, good things happen? That your positive energy actually begets positive energy. I like to smile at people I pass. Sometimes they just pass without noticing, sometimes they smile back, sometimes they are so pissed off at the universe they practically growl at me. But I still do it.

It's fun.

And who knows. It may ultimately create enough of a ripple effect to change the world. I like to think perhaps they might then smile at someone else during the day. And so on, and so on, and so on. Soon everyone will be smiling. We would all benefit from the excess positive energy to draw from.

Yesterday I traveled two hours to my dads house. You might know that my mother passed away just two months ago. There is paperwork that needs to be signed, articles to be riffled through, sorted and packed away or discarded.

It's hard to do.
I don't like to do it. So I procrastinate.

I should go see my dad more often. But I feel a burden of responsibility when I do, and it weighs heavy on my shoulders. My brother called and said, "Dad said there's some important papers you need to sign. It's holding things up. Dad says it's urgent."

I didn't think it was 'urgent' and I had a full day planned. I had things that I needed to do and accomplish. I didn't have the time to run over and neglect my own work. But I went anyway. Turns out it really wasn't urgent after all. But guess what...?

We had a great day.

My initial outlook was altered. What was given me was grand.

Little things like this change my attitude and perspective. It's a minor tweak, but it's a good one. One I should practice daily. It's a good lesson.

So today as the sun is starting to rise, I wonder what my day my hold in store for me. I know what I'd like, but it may not turn out that way. But it's how I will approach the then obstacle that may turn out to be quite cool.

You just never know. Whatever happens to me today, you'll probably read about here tomorrow.

Life is funny like that...


  1. I'm working on shifting my attitude or perspective at the moment and find it difficult right now -- however, I'm a big believer that is probably when I need to do it the most.

    I know if I keep at it, things will change.

    Ever notice that confidence attracts confidence? It's very infectious. But, in a good way.

  2. I'm just coming out of a long stretch of terminal pessimism, so this was a great post for a Saturday morning! Thanks!

  3. I wish I could be a ray of sunshine like you. I will keep trying. Thanks for the inspiration.

  4. Lovely post. Some days I am able to sit down with myself and go over of all of these things - because I really do believe them. Other days, it's a little harder, but I'm a work in progress (and really, aren't we all?). Thanks for this, I needed it! - G

  5. I wish someone would come up to me in a grocery store and tell me about my aura:). And I even live in Northern California. It ought to be possible...

  6. And this is what I love about you. Your glass is always half full while mine is always half empty with a crack in it.

  7. Keep Passing It Forward!

  8. I do agree about positive energy creating more positive energy. Sometimes it's just hard to do. Karma does exist. What goes around comes around and all that. I continually remind myself of that fact.
    Thanks for stopping by my site the other day!

  9. I am also one of those people who always find the slowest line, almost without fail. But I think it's because the Universe is teaching me patience. Fortunately for you, you're learning the lesson! I am just impatient to get there faster... and being forced to deal with slowing down. Good post, I really enjoyed it. Glad you took the time to be with your dad, and that it turned out well.

  10. Hi Nancy, I liked your appreciation of your bad luck. I have many "wtf?!" moments, especially when I'm travelling. But those are always the things I talk to folk about after, and I'm usually laughing when I do. Marakech was one long fuckup in many respects, but I wouldn't have missed it for the world. Thanks for reminding me. Indigo

  11. @Little MissBlogger - I agree. It's on the days that it's hard are the ones that we need to concentrate on!

    @CatLady Lerew - I'm glad I could be a source of inspriation for you today!

    @MeanStepmom - as it's currently raining (and raining hard) I don't quite feel like Little Miss Sunshine, but that comment sure did give me a smile! Thanks!

    @Geogeina - We are ALL works in progress, that's for sure! At least I know I am! Hope your day is wonderful!

    @LPC - Perhaps your aura in the grocery is one they choose not to share with you! It might ruin your day. ;-)

    @Chrissy - Your glass ain't cracked darlin'. It's just that you drank everything in the glass!

    @Arlan - Thanks for stopping by. Great sites, I'll stop over again.

    @Jen - I'm counting on the what goes around comes around. I'm waiting! (plus I can't wait to see the shitstorm that's going to hit some people I know...that'll be great entertainment!)

    @DJan - I USED to be more impatient, but found that it didn't do anything but adversely effect my mood. So I gave it up. :-)

    @Indigo - Your welcome for the reminder! There are some events that are such clusters, that you do just have to laugh and laugh and laugh...
    I've not been to Marakech. I'm a little jealous right now. Just givin' you warning!

    Thanks for the comments!!!

  12. I think my problem is that I'm looking at the world through a rose-colored kaleidoscope.

  13. I'm unfortunately not always the optimist, but I surround myself with friends who are. And THAT makes the world a better place to live in :)

  14. Very nice post! I love to smile at random people too - it keeps them guessing and makes my co-workers even more paranoid than they already are, but it makes me happy, so I keep doing it.

  15. This post is another reason why I keep coming back. Wonderully written and hits real close to home for me. I've been procrastinating on seeing the parents. Mom's really sick, but that's not it. It's my dad. All he does is talk about doctors, my mom's illnesses, doom and gloom. Anyway, after reading your post, I think I'm gonna go down tomorrow. Thanks for another wonderful post.

    Oh yeah, there's an award waiting for you at my place.

  16. First of all...GREAT POST Nancy!

    There is so much GOOD stuff in this that I could go on and on about how I agree with you on so many points you brought up. The more I read about you the more I see our similarities on how we look at things.

    And one being....'s all in how you choose to look at it. It's all in our perception...

    We don't always have control over every single thing that happens in our lives, but we do have control over how we SEE it.

    I've had some of the BEST surprises in things "not going as I planned."

    Enjoy the rest of your weekend, Nancy!

  17. Beautifully said, Nancy! As time goes on, I'm believing more and more in the idea that confidence breeds more confidence. I find that I enjoy speaking up to strangers...if I like someone's hair or their blouse, I'll tell them. I do that a LOT. It's not that I think my opinion's so special, but I know it makes me happy when someone compliments me. We all can use a little of that now and then....

  18. Mmmm... thank you. I needed to read this. You have blessed me, so you know it's coming back around.

  19. Well said. I wish I had that outlook on life. Thanks for writing this, I really needed to read it today.

  20. @DK - Ha! Somedays it seems like a kaleidescope inside my frames as well. Isn't it pretty?!

    @ladytruth - Well if you can't be optismistic yourself, then get it vicariously from those around you! That works! Maybe I'll help as well!

    @Traqvel & dive - Ha! That's great! Sometimes it's the little things that we enjoy that are the most the co-workers misery.

    @Theresa - Aren't you a doll. Thanks for the award! I put a little sidebar up and will get to it this week! Love you!!!

    @Ron - Thanks my're the best. I think sometimes things happen AGAINST my plan just to save me from myself! :-)

    @Kathryn - I think that's a great idea, and one I try to implement as well. One day I asked if hte manager was around, and they just about cringed. I wasn't going to complain, I wanted to give kudos to an employee. We've become so accustomed to hearing the BAD and never the good that people don't expect it.

    @Fumblingconidence - YEAH! I knew it wouldn't take TOO long! I'm glad to be of assistance...and thanks to YOU for being here.

    @Insanity - Thanks for stopping by. Glad to be of service! Sonetimes my friends get a little aggrevated with my positive outlook, but when I hit the other side, I hit it hard. Thank God it all balances out...usually to my favor. Stop back again!

    Thanks again to all your comments! It means alot to me. Hope you all had a great weekend. Alas, it's coming to a close...

  21. Yep, the 'pay it forward" thing is for real. I mentioned it in a post last week-- how can it not work? And how can we not try?

    I also do the 'smile at everyone' thing most days. (Sometimes, I admit, I just can't.) It has amazing powers...

  22. I like happiness and optimism. It costs nothing and offers everything.

  23. I wish I were fortunate like u....

  24. @Leah Rubin - I agree with you! AND it takes so much less energy than frowning and is SO much better for your face! :-)
    I missed your post, going to go back and check NOW!

    @Matthew - I think I'm going to Tweet your comment today. Perfectly said! Fact is, that should be put on a Tshirt. If I do (and make any money on it) I'll split it with you!

    @asit dhal - A friend bought me this little plaque that I have hanging on my office wall. It says "Better living through denial". Sometimes when I'm not feeling all that 'UP', I pretend I am, and then it happens.

    Thanks guys!
    Taking the time to leave me comments is what gives me that optiistic attitude!


  25. You know, I thin kwe have an awful lot in common. I too have been approached by a stranged who told me my aura was purple with green "fringe". I love that kind of crap and spent a few happy minutes chatting with the woman in question.

  26. You are awesome and this post is inspirational.

    What you said about smiling at others is true. I usually try to do the same, but never thought too much about it. A few weeks ago I was having a really bad day, and spent most of it trying not to burst into tears at work. While walking down the hall (I work at a college) a girl looked up from her notebook and smiled at me. It seriously changed my whole day. I make much more of an effort now.

  27. I've never had someone tell me about my aura, but I think that would be an awesome experience to have had. How lucky you are.

  28. Reminds me of a poem I once read, something about 'this to shall pass'.

    I imagine what an amazing place the world would be if we cut out the rotten attitude. Think how much one person could change the lives of everyone they touch. When someone learns to get over themself and think about how they effect other people, great things happen.

    If, even in one day, everyone who has read this post did everything with a positive attitude... If we didn't cause any hard feelings or fuel any anger... For just one day. How many lives would we touch?

    Just one day of kindness, and I know the world wouldn't be the same.

  29. Wow... awesome post. I agree. There's no point in sweating the little things you can't control anyway. Might as well make the best of it. And you're right; they usually make good blog material. ;)


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